useless fireman
i was driving on oak ridge parkway (not a parkway at all, but a pretty, winding road through the neighborhood in which i grew up). a car was making a K-turn (do we only call them "K-turns" in new jersey? do you all call them 3-point turns?). as it pulled forward it somehow started a fire in the brush on the side of the road. i drove ahead, looking back at the flames, pulling over and then continuing on, swerving a bit. the fire was getting bigger. i pulled off onto a side road and went to make my own K-turn to head back and do something. i also had my phone in my hand and was calling 911.
in the midst of K-turning/911-calling a couple of men came up to my car. 911 had me on hold, listening to some pre-recorded message. but these men were firemen! what luck! i told one of them about the fire and he seemed in absolutely no hurry at all to put it out. i was still on hold. i was still trying to persuade him to get moving and extinguish the flames.
soon the fire had grown large enough that the smoke reached me and my newfound firefighting acquaintances. this evidence of danger did not get him moving any faster. he was being controlling and annoying.
around this time i learned his name. i think it was slake-o maven. or slake-o haven. something of the sort.
slake-o told me that if the 911 call went through and was dispatched to him, that i'd have to go wait by the fire for him to show up. i was prepared to do this and almost drove away, but i realized that he wasn't going to show up anyway.
this was infuriating! they were firefighters! there was a fire! they were doing nothing!
the end.
posted by jammies @ 5:34 PM
4 comments
4 Comments:
Ha. Typical.....(actually, maybe not, but it sounded like a fitting response.) I have never heard the term "K-turn" before - I think we're '3-pointers' up here, although, I personally tend to not get all official & just say, "I'm turning around." K turn, 3 point turn, U turn, blue turn, shoe turn, glue turn, boo turn (a special kind of turn executed only during the Halloween season, in case you were unaware.)...Whatever works, I suppose! I like the name slake-o. It would make an awesome & original cat name, don't you think? --> "Here, slake-o, come here slake-o!" What a dream. It's too bad that the firefighter let you down.....like I said, typical. :)
oooh! after rehearsal on wednesday will you teach me how to make a boo turn? 'tis the season. i'd like to learn the glue turn, too, but it sounds sticky.
I was taught that a K-turn and a 3-point turn are slightly different. In a 3-point turn, you begin by driving forward and to the left, then back and to the right, then forward in the opposite direction you started out in. In a K turn, you begin by backing to the right or left, then forward in the opposite direction you started out in. It's like a 2-point turn.
The idea with a K turn is that if you are on a narrow road, your front wheels never leave the pavement. In a front wheel drive car, this allows you to turn around without risking getting stuck in mud/grass/whatever on the shoulder.
wow nick! your turning knowledge amazes me. i'm having trouble picturing this, but you'll have to demonstrate next time i see you. i can't wait! :)
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